Motorhead in Moscow Live 2000

MOTORHEAD IN MOSCOW
Part I
(in which MetalKings.ru goes celebrity hunting and ends up nearly doing an interview with Lemmy)
true story! ;)

The action started long before the actual show down at the V-Day Park (Moscow) where the world's once loudest band was to appear for an MTV footage. The weather was chilly and the skies were pissing sleet upon a small group of youngsters in leather jackets and boots when we approached the meeting spot. Everybody was very agitated and naturally tried to relax their nerves by a very old but still extremely effective method, by consuming large amounts of ice-cold beer that is. Well, even more naturally, given the cold weather conditions and general nervousness, this resulted in an excessive pressure in everyone's collective bladders that cried for being relieved. Soon (but no sooner than we were trying to figure out the dilemma of wetting our pants or missing the Motorhead appearance) the show producer appeared and ushered us into the WWII museum located in the middle of the Park. The gimmick about the whole thing was that Lemmy (who as everyone knows takes a major interest in military history) was to act as a guide for a handful of MTV-chosen fans and show them around the exposition (yeah, well, the usual MTV hype).

Anyhows, we moved in, took our coats off at the cloak room and sat down waiting taking turns in our short visits to the restroom. In a short while the rest of the TV crew showed up together with the host who immediately started giving the instructions as to what was to be going on when the things started rolling and to what we were supposed (and mainly not supposed) to do. And then just the moment she finally seemed to have everyone's undivided attention, like in a bad movie, Lemmy's face popped in through the entrance door. Nodding 'hi' to everyone and taking very little notice of the MTV group and altogether ignoring the protests of the museum staff about their overcoats and lit cigarettes (yes, Kilmister, naturally), the band proceeded to the main exposition. This was the moment of truth. I still can't figure out why everyone's decided to stay with the MTV crew, but, damn, who gives an airborne copulation about that! Me and Doll reasoned that for once it was not about MTV but about Motorhead and quickly sneaked away from the rest of the group following Lemmy's tall figure. Not wanting to be a major pain in the neck from the very beginning we thought it best to sort of detach ourselves from what was going on and simply followed the group around the halls, doing our best not to stare and laugh hysterically in the best possible Beavis-and-Butthead manner. I mean, this was not an official press conference or anything where you can do and ask whatever you want and get away with it, but in that particular situation it was best for us not to become too annoying, especially after Mickey told us they were all exhausted after the St. Petersburg gig. Nonetheless I couldn't resist the temptation and as soon as Lemmy sat down for a short rest I approached him and presented him the book on Russian and Soviet military awards that I prepared especially for his coming birthday. Boy, a man and a reporter were fighting inside of me! The fan inside of me cried 'take his autograph, take a picture, thank and run off, you've been to lucky as it is!' while the reporter insisted I should try to take an interview, since this was a chance of lifetime... well, all to my surprise professionalism won and I ended up ...an interpreter! (grudd bless higher linguistic education and my university, amen! ;)))

But well, let's put things in order. After 20-some minutes of going around the museum Phil and Mickey left off for the hotel taking their assistant and interpreter with them and leaving Lemmy in the hands of the MTV guys. It was only then when it turned out the host didn't really speak any English, and, most naturally I thought of nothing better than to lend a helping hand and offered my services as a professional. The rest of it is below (questions were coming both from the host, the fans and yours truly).
- Lemmy, what does WWII mean to you?
- It's interesting. It ended the year I was born and it was something that involved a lot of people. A big event.
- Took a lot of people's lives as well.
- That's what I am saying, it totally changed our lives and touched upon everyone. It is not as close to you as it is to me, given the difference in age, you know. But it changed everyone's lives.
- I hear you got a big collection of WWII orders and medals?
- True, got a few Russian ones there.
- Which ones?
- Three guard badges, like they got back there (pointing to a glass in the far corner), a couple more.
- Back in 1945 everyone thought nazism was over with, but nowadays there's a lot of neo-nazis both in this country and abroad, what do you make of it?
- You don't have to worry about it, they have no leader. Hitler is dead, so they don't have anyone to lead them, don't worry about it.
- What about communists?
- Same thing. They don't have a leader.
- (This one comes from one of the fans) How does it feel being the forefather of the biker movement?
- Forefather? I ain't even got a bike.
- (the host, taking him to a model of WWII sub) Do you know anything about this sub?
- No (shaking his head in bemusement) It's too small, must be Japanese. Awful.
- You ever been to a sub?
- No, thanks god.
- What feeling claustrophobic about it?
- I tell you I haven't been into one, but I guess I would if I have, wouldn't you?
- Guess so, do you collect any guns?
- No, only daggers. I don't like guns, knives seem more honest to me. Sort of more personal.
- Would you go after a bear with a knife?
- Hell no! Would you?
- Me? Of course, not.
- That's what I'm saying, nuts! (circling his index finger round the temple, so as to show how much nuts I am) I don't know, two knives maybe...
- (the host, taking him over to an anti-aircraft cannon) Hey would you like to use one of these in you shows?
- Nah, we don't need them. Loud enough as we are.
- (the host) Ok, thanks for your time and for answering our questions. You know our program is called BANZAI (whatever they spell it!) and at the end of each show our guests should go shouting 'BANZAI' as loud as they can, so...
- God, I am British in Russia and screaming in Japanese on MTV!
- okay, everyone here we go: 'BANZAI!' (raising his hands and doing the bow in the almighty Bungholio style), 'BANZAI!'
...And well, that was pretty much it. After the cord was pulled off, Lemmy was as nice as to spend about 15 minutes taking the pictures with the fans and signing the stuff, leaving two of his autographs in somebody's passports(!), after which he did an MTV news-block, waved good bye to everyone, and left off for the evening show...

Part II
(the show)

By the time our editorial dragged their arses over to the showplace, the crowd in front of the venue was not too big, partly because of the fact that many a good lad were already knocked off their feet by alcohol and partly because of the cops who were quite persistent in inviting everyone inside. Choosing it was best not to argue their respected authority we quickly sucked on our beers and hurried inside the premises where soon we knew all hell would break lose, when a husky voice announced in a dimly lit chamber - 'We're Motorhead! And we're coming here to kick your ass!' Anyhows, shouldering our way through the crowd that was packed inside of the venue we managed to make it to the cloakroom and then tried to get through to the merchandising section, which turned out to be a lot harder than we had thought it would be. I mean, even though the prices went sky high because for once it was not only the products of the local distributor but also the goodies the band brought with them, like THE official stuff, getting down to picking something was next to impossible given the continuous shoving in one's back and the unfriendly looks thrown at those lucky bastidz who in fact did manage to purchase something. I personally only succeeded on second attempt and getting a couple of friendly punches somewhere in the region of the kidneys and a couple of elbows under the ribs squeezed myself out of this mini-moshpit. Seeing that the gig was late and that there was no need in any hurry, we considered getting some more lager, hang out, and have a smoke, you know, but the crowd in front of the tap quickly altered our plans to the reverse. Well, tough shit, but let's face it, it wasn't for the beer tat we came over there, was it?

After about an hour of exhausting waiting the lights went out and Lemmy & Co hit the stage and kick-started the show with their latest 'We're Motorhead. (Coming to Kick Your Ass)'. Well saying that everyone went apeshit would most surely be a gross underestimation. In fact, I don't think my feeble vocabulary has a word for describing what was going on there, but at a certain point I thought we were in for a local Armageddon. However, as soon as my own agitation passed, to my greatest dismay, I noticed that the sound sucked big freaking time. Like the only thing you could actually hear was Lemmy's bass, partly - his voice, and a lot of drums. The guitar was lost totally, no matter how much I tried to strain my ears in an attempt to hear it. Fortunately enough this torture lasted for only a couple of first tracks after which the bug was fixed and everything went more or less fine. More or less, meaning that the drums were still over the place, twisting your guts, hatching through your head, and bouncing off the wall, but well, compared to the whole mayhem that was going on down there that day this was just a mere inconvenience. In the meantime the band continued with such all-time classics as 'Bomber', 'Stay Clean', and 'Metropilis.' Yessir, it was Motorhead - 25 years and still rocking in the way only they know how to rock. You know sometimes, I think if there is anything that can stop'em. The dude is 50+ now but he is still as groovy as hell.

Anyway, let's get back to the gig. The middle of it was highlighted by yet another hit when, to everyone's surprise, Kilmister called out - 'Are there any punks here?' (disturbed mumbling in the audience) 'Any punks?' (Hell, yeah, there're some) 'Well this song is for you then' - he says, and triggers it off with the all too famous (or should I say notorious) Sex Pistols' 'God Save the Queen' (alias 'No Future'). Do I really have to say, this was an all-venue sing-along?! The rest of it were hits, hits and nothing but hits - 'Orgasmatron,' (with the traditional green stage-lights), 'Born to Raise Hell', 'Iron Fist', Sacrifice with an absobloodylutely awesome drum solo in the middle, 'Killed by Death' and most naturally last but not least - 'Ace of Spades' and 'Overkill' for encores. It just don't get any better than this I tell you! For me personally this was already the second Motorhead gig, and although I didn't enjoy it as much as I enjoyed the first one (the power of novelty I guess), and although I didn't hear my personal absolute favourites 'The Chase is Better than the Catch' and 'You Better Run', still I have to be objective - this band just never gets old… Cuz, they're Motorhead and they're - rock'n'roll!

(Troll)

TRACKLIST (running order very approximate as usual)
1. We're Motorhead
2. Bomber
3. I'm so bad
4. Metropolis
5. Civil War
6. Shoot you in the Back
7. Stay Clean
8. Stay out of Jail
9. Iron Fist
10. God Save the Queen
11. Damage Case
12. Born to Raise Hell
13. Sacrifice
14. Orgasmatron
15. Going to Brazil
16. Killed by Death
17. Ace of Spades
18. Overkill